Definitive Recipe for Hard Cooked Eggs

April 26, 2008

Back in my grad school days at Texas A&M, I was a teaching assistant for a class called Poultry Processing. The students probably remember the time they spent dressing out chickens to be used for the remainder of the labs. I think some of the best parts involved teaching a class comprised largely of cowboys to bake Angle Food Cake as a measure of egg functionality. One of the groups my first year accidentally substituted dry mustard for cream of tartar and were so pleased with themselves that they convinced me to taste it. They’d never baked so much as a tube of cookies before, so I obliged.

One of the most useful pieces of info I picked up for myself however, was how to make the perfect hard cooked egg. This will give you perfectly done, non-green, non-runny, non-rubbery eggs, with no chunks out of the albumen every single time.

The key to making sure the peels come off easily is by starting with slightly older eggs. I actually prefer eggs that I have been sitting in my fridge for at least a week. When eggs are first laid, they have a pH around neutrality. As the egg ages; however, it picks up carbon dioxide through its pores. Eventually, the bicarbonate buffer system in the egg is overwhelmed, and the egg can no longer hold a pH of 7. The egg becomes more alkaline (basic), eventually getting to a pH of around 9. The protein which initially holds the albumen firmly to the shell membrane becomes denatured and stops working. So when you cook the slightly older egg, the peel will come away without clinging to the egg white. Get the eggs too old, and you’ll have yolks that have drifted in the albumen, and won’t be centered when you split them. And of course, you are going to fully cook these eggs to kill off whatever bacteria may be growing in them.

Hard Cooked Eggs:
Place desired number of eggs in a pan. Add enough cold water to just cover the eggs. Bring water to a full rolling boil, place the lid on firmly, and remove from heat. Steep the eggs for exactly 15 minutes, and then plunge them in ice water. Tap the eggs lightly against the side of your sink to break up the shell, and roll them between your palms to loosen. Peel and use. Perfect. Every. Time.

Smashed Potato Salad

April 26, 2008

6 medium Yukon Gold Potatoes, chopped
¼ cup cider vinegar
½ cup mayo
¼ brown mustard
Juice of one lime
½ small red onion, chopped
2 large pickles, chopped
1 ½ hard-boiled egg yolks, chopped
3 hard-boiled egg whites, chopped
3 tbs dill, chopped
3 tbs chives, chopped
Zest of one lime
Kosher salt
Fresh cracked pepper

Boil potatoes in heavily salted water until barely fork tender. Drain potatoes and place in large mixing boil. Smash  with hand held potato masher. Leave as many or as few potato chunks as desired. While potatoes are still steaming hot, add mayo, mustard, vinegar, and lime juice. Mix lightly. Add remaining ingredients and stir lightly to combine. Add extra mayo if the mixture is too dry. Refrigerate before serving.

*Personal Bias Alert* I personally think that the large chunks of potato in most potato salads are flavorless wads of congealed library paste. But: If leaving the potatoes fairly chunky, add mayo, vinegar, mustard, and herbs to the hot potatoes. Allow them to cool fully before adding the other veg. This will help the flavor penetrate the chunks a bit more. Usually I smash my potatoes but good.

Faux Meat. Sooooo not a recipe.

April 22, 2008

I was reading on the New York Times today that PETA has announced a contest offering $1 Million to the first producer of commercially viable meat from cell culture. http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/21/us/21meat.html

The idea here is that using donor cells from mammalian muscles, scientists could engineer meats (mostly textured products… essentially meat paste) in the laboratory. No living animal need die to provide your chicken nuggets or burgers. Sounds great for those consumers with an ethical problem eating foods created by the death of another being.

However, even though we scientists like to tout cell culture as a more humane alternative to animal research, and now animal eating, the process involves the use of a media additive called Fetal Bovine Serum (FBS), or Fetal Calf Serum. This is a damn nasty substance, imho.

Essentially cell culturists can’t figure out exactly what nutritive components a cell culture needs to thrive. So we add FBS in concentrations of up to 10% to our media. The serum serves as an undefined media component in which mammalian cells can survive in a culture. The problem with FBS is that it must be obtained from….. Fetal Bovines. When a pregnant cow is slaughtered and eviscerated, the fetus is removed with the other viscera. It is then removed to another portion of the slaughter facility where blood is collected from it’s largest pool, in the usually still beating heart of the fetus. This is done via a freakin’ big needle. There is some debate as to whether or not the fetus can feel or fear at this point, but it’s still a fairly barbaric practice. It is contingent on the slaughter of both cow and calf.

Hardly death free meat. Correct?

I’m not a vegetarian. Despite my restrictions on the provenience of my food, I believe that humans are intended to consume flesh. I don’t believe however that the conscious consumer deserves the potential bait and switch that “laboratory meat” may turnout to be.

Creamy Dill Salad Dressing

April 20, 2008

1 ½ cups Greek yogurt
zest of one lemon
juice of one lemon
3 tbs chopped dill
3 tbs chopped chives
1 tsp honey
1 tsp kosher salt
1 tsp fresh cracked pepper
Buttermilk to thin

Combine yogurt, juice, zest, herbs, seasonings, and honey. Mix in just enough buttermilk to thin to a desired consistency. Refrigerate for at least 4 hours.

Oven pot roast.

April 19, 2008

3 lb chuck roast
½ cup flour
Salt and Pepper
2 tbs olive oil
1 medium onion, sliced
2/3 cup red wine
1 tbs fresh thyme leaves
1 cup carrots, chopped
6 small Yukon gold potatoes, chopped
2 tbs flour

Apply salt and pepper to all surfaces of the chuck roast. Mix together flour, salt and pepper in a large ziplock bag. Place roast in bag, seal, and shake to coat. Heat olive oil in oven safe pan. Brown the roast on all sides until dark and crusted. Remove meat from pan. Add onions, stirring until just soft. Deglaze pan w/ red wine. Place roast back in pan with onions, piling some onions on top of the roast and leaving some under it. Add fresh thyme leaves. Cover tightly. Place in oven at 280F for about 2 hours. Remove and reserve pan drippings if liquid layer is more than ¼ way up the side of the beef. Add carrots and potatoes. Recover and cook for another hour or until the roast is falling off the bone. Remove roast and vegetables from the pan. Remove about ½ cup of the pan drippings and whisk in flour with a fork. Bring remaining drippings to a simmer adding beef broth if necessary to obtain desired volume. Whisk in flour mixture and allow to thicken, simmering over low heat. Serve over meat and veg.

As it turns out, Lunch and Dinner are very tasty steers.

The Undepants Conspiracy

April 18, 2008

I’m constantly searching for the perfect pair of underwear, and I’ve never found anything that comes close. It must be cotton. It must be roomy enough to not be uncomfortable, but not so loose as to give the dreaded “sag butt.”

You know the movie “Conspiracy Theory” where Mel Gibson has been brainwashed and he’s tracked by the purchase of A Catcher in the Rye? I fear that at some point I was stolen by some sort of nefarious agency and brainwashed in to thinking every time I walk past a bin of underpants, I must stop and buy some. Just in case. The perfect pair could be lurking in any store.

Garlic Kale

April 15, 2008

1 bunch kale, stems removed. torn
6 cloves garlic, chopped
2 tbs olive oil
Tahini dressing from 101 Cookbooks http://www.101cookbooks.com/

Tahini Dressing:
1 garlic clove, smashed and chopped
1/4 cup tahini
zest of one lemon
scant 1/4 cup freshly squeezed lemon juice
2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
2 tablespoons hot water
scant 1/2 teaspoon fine grain sea salt

Combine tahini, lemon zest, juice, olive oil, and sea salt. Whisk in hot water to thin.

Garlic Kale:

Heat a heavy sauce pan on medium high heat. Add olive oil to coat bottom of pan. Add garlic to hot oil and heat until golden, being sure the garlic doesn’t burn. Remove any pieces of garlic that do. Add kale to garlic and oil. Allow to wilt until just softened, but still with a little bite. Alternately remove pan from heat, and put it back on so that the garlic doesn’t burn and become bitter. Serve kale with a drizzle of tahini dressing

The job hunt.

April 15, 2008

I’ve been looking for a new job for the last several months. The trouble is that I’m attempting to move into the ultra-desirable Austin job market. Life scientists are pouring out of the University of Texas faster than biotech firms in the area can hire them. Plus, everybody and her dog wants to live there. The result is months of resume writing, interviewing, and turning down offers that would actually be insulting to peanuts.

The latest interview process is turning out to be quite the pain. A day long interview and a lecture topic that keeps getting changed has me wanting to follow my Plan Z.

http://www.flakmag.com/misc/images/wafflehouse.jpg

I think that I could be serious Waffle House short order cook material. I already know how I like my hashbrowns and everything. (Scattered and smothered)

New Path

April 13, 2008

Today my brand new rock way was installed. This updates the former flagstone path and porch, sunk in concrete instead of sand. Hopefully this will survive the first rain.

Vindictive Cats.

April 12, 2008

When I leave for a weekend I take the dog with me and leave the cats with extra water and a self feeder. They usually get back at me for this by leaving the odd hairball in my shoe. Mostly I wear rubber shoes, so this is fine.

Today they out did themselves though. I came home to a dead and partially rotted bright green lizard in the living room floor. They had a good time batting the little beast around the floor and managed to impart a lovely green sheen to the hard wood. Then one of them, I’m guessing Nero… the 20 lb mildly neurotic Siamese mix, got hungry and ate part of our newly departed reptile friend. Then he hurled bright green bits-o-lizard all over the rug.

Why did I turn the air-con off before I left? Why does Lysol spray not do too much to mask the smell of tortured lizard? Oh crap, is that a tail under the piano?